Quote:
Originally Posted by shimshimhada
Nah, you can go to hell. You just get rejudged for good on judgement day. Then you get thrown into the Lake of Fire, where your existence is erased. 
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Health Insurance Claim Evaluator [nervously]: Great, so I'm in?
St. Peter [consulting computer]: Well, there's good news and bad news.
Insurance guy: What's the good news?
St. Peter: You've met admission criteria for Heaven.
Insurance guy: Great! What's the bad news?
St. Peter: You've only been approved for a five day length of stay.