Too soon?

deutschmann59 · 03-19-2006, 09:40 PM

I'd be super-pissed if a chick acted like she was interested in me and then all of a sudden she isn't.

You can always use the old "I've got a baby to take care of" routine. That always made me instantly lose interest...however, everytime it happened it was true...I don't know how good you are at lying!

shimshimhada · 03-19-2006, 09:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sharp1183

I'd be super-pissed if a chick acted like she was interested in me and then all of a sudden she isn't.

You can always use the old "I've got a baby to take care of" routine. That always made me instantly lose interest...however, everytime it happened it was true...I don't know how good you are at lying!

Do it, Ant.

findtom · 03-19-2006, 09:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sharp1183

I'd be super-pissed if a chick acted like she was interested in me and then all of a sudden she isn't.

You can always use the old "I've got a baby to take care of" routine. That always made me instantly lose interest...however, everytime it happened it was true...I don't know how good you are at lying!

Haha... going the lying route, she could always tell the guy she's a post-op transvestite. That should cool his interest.

shimshimhada · 03-19-2006, 09:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by findtom

Haha... going the lying route, she could always tell the guy she's a post-op transvestite. That should cool his interest.

Do it, Ant.

shimshimhada · 03-19-2006, 09:56 PM

Better yet, say you're a post-op with a baby!

BMW F22 · 03-19-2006, 09:58 PM

So I saw the title of this thread and thought "what the hell is too soon? It's not a marriage or a proposal." So Bella- if you're looking for a fun time between now and the time you leave, let all hell break loose.

deutschmann59 · 03-19-2006, 10:05 PM

Hey BMWE90, not to change the subject, but tomorrow's the big day, eh?

BMW F22 · 03-19-2006, 10:07 PM

Tomorrow's monday. I have that class on Tuesday and Thursday. HAHA the wait is driving me crazy.

Neil · 03-19-2006, 10:27 PM

I don't know if the guy is a superstud or not but if not perhaps he is smitten by a fairly attractive woman seeming to get closer to him. Guys aren't great generally at getting the small hints given off by women. Just be more obvious.

Or perhaps he knows you are leaving and wants to score before you leave. Some people have lofty goals.

shimshimhada · 03-19-2006, 10:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Neil

I don't know if the guy is a superstud or not but if not perhaps he is smitten by a fairly attractive woman seeming to get closer to him. Guys aren't great generally at getting the small hints given off by women. Just be more obvious.

Or perhaps he knows you are leaving and wants to score before you leave. Some people have lofty goals.

He has a bike.

EDIT: Oh yeah, he HAD a bike.

BellasBmw · 03-20-2006, 01:31 AM

Ok hes not ugly. But he has baggage too. Hes a cool guy, but.. i dont know why i cant just "let all hell break loose". Im paranoid about dating, and it feels awkward, but at the same time i was all about him before he started asking me to hang out all the time.

My x- long story. We were together for 2 yrs, close as hell, and he lost trust, and became paranoid. Starting accusing me of cheating, and wanted to listen to voicemail/check my phone/email...etc. We broke it off dec 1 (bad breakup) and on dec 23 he trashed my room and stole all my jewelry, money, xmas gifts..etc. So yea im having a hard time getting over that, esp since i havent talked to him at all since dec 1. I have no asnwers to why, and my family helpd him ALOT. Even i did. I found out he was doing coke behind my back. He started to sell alot of weed..So it makes me wonder how can you really know someone.. i thought i did. Guess i was wrong.

Anyway im just afraid of meeting another wacko guy. I didnt think he was, but then wow what a wake up call.

As for being sexual with the guy, i just dont care/feel like it. I mean whatever, its not like my x where i WANTED him.. And before me and the new guy hung out.. i thought about it alot. Maybe he's too pushy and im losing the interest. But im gonna tell him that im planning to spend the rest of my time here with my girlfriends and family. Sure we can hang out but liek once a week.

findtom · 03-20-2006, 01:54 AM

Wow... sorry to hear that, what a psycho.

E90-4life · 03-20-2006, 01:58 AM

Well, a couple of things...

1. it's his fault for having gotten too excited, guys should be a lot better than that at reading girls these days.

2. Don't blame other potential future mates for the screw ups of previous bf's. they shouldn't be penialized for crap they didn't do. Not trying to sound abrasive, just honest.

mtnyeti12 · 03-20-2006, 02:55 AM

Bella - does he repeatedly put his hand on your leg then pull it away followed by "A schuzzy... a schuzzy... a schuzzy me". If so you may have a problem....

Okay so I just saw Euro Trip... things get out here a little slower.

timzerofive · 03-20-2006, 03:54 AM

I don't think you should make up an excuse to hang out less with him. You should just come right out and say it... I like you, but since I just got out of a long relationship, I think you're moving a little too fast for me. Especially since I'll be moving away for school soon, I don't want to get into any serious relationship. We can still hang out once in a while if you like, but I think that's about it... IMO you should say something to that effect, otherwise, no matter what you do, you'll hurt people's feeling sooner or later.

BellasBmw · 03-20-2006, 04:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by timzerofive

I don't think you should make up an excuse to hang out less with him. You should just come right out and say it... I like you, but since I just got out of a long relationship, I think you're moving a little too fast for me. Especially since I'll be moving away for school soon, I don't want to get into any serious relationship. We can still hang out once in a while if you like, but I think that's about it... IMO you should say something to that effect, otherwise, no matter what you do, you'll hurt people's feeling sooner or later.

Yeah im thinking of saying that.. however, what if hes not looking for a serious relationship either. He could just be putting the moves on to get laid. If thats the case, hes gotta slow it down. Women like a chase, esp me.. i wanna work for it. I dont want the shit handed to me, its no fun and it wont be exciting. Hes gotta act like he doesnt like me. Now how do i tell him that?? haha.

mtnyeti12 · 03-20-2006, 04:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

Yeah im thinking of saying that.. however, what if hes not looking for a serious relationship either. He could just be putting the moves on to get laid. If thats the case, hes gotta slow it down. Women like a chase, esp me.. i wanna work for it. I dont want the shit handed to me, its no fun and it wont be exciting. Hes gotta act like he doesnt like me. Now how do i tell him that?? haha.

Too true about the chase.. thats really what makes the first time so exciting

but it's a very fine line. I've caught myself doing that - sometimes it backfires and next thing you know the girl I like is with another guy. Then when I talk to her she says "Oh! I thought you didn't like me? But I'm dating so-and-so now...." Greeeeeat.....

ksfrogman · 03-20-2006, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

Yeah im thinking of saying that.. however, what if hes not looking for a serious relationship either. He could just be putting the moves on to get laid. If thats the case, hes gotta slow it down. Women like a chase, esp me.. i wanna work for it. I dont want the shit handed to me, its no fun and it wont be exciting. Hes gotta act like he doesnt like me. Now how do i tell him that?? haha.

This may be a case of "good guys finish last." Men and women seem to be drawn more toward the unattainable as they like a challenge, and yet there's a fine line between being too available (one openly and honestly admits ones feelings) and game playing in which ones plans or motives are more obscure. Ironically, the people who complain they don't like those who play games are the same ones who are repulsed by those who are too frank and honest at the beginning.

Seems like you would like him more if he gave you less attention and was less interested in you. You don't believe in "love at first sight?" Remember, you aproached him first.

Oz · 03-20-2006, 09:12 AM

I hope he's not reading this thread..

I think you should just tell him your deal straight up before It gets any further.

Neil · 03-20-2006, 11:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Oz

I hope he's not reading this thread..

I think you should just tell him your deal straight up before It gets any further.

Maybe pointing him here would be a good idea, at least the poor fellow would get a clue and maybe some tips and pointers for next time.

Why do women have such hard times saying what they want? Seems every relationship I've been in and many of friends have been where the woman assumes the guy knows what she wants all the time and then holds it inside until it bursts.

BellasBmw · 03-20-2006, 12:00 PM

Trust me, ive actually never been the type to not express how i feel. Im usually straight forward and honest. But for some weird reason i just cant tell him. Maybe its cause i feel bad since he really likes me. But whatever, hes gonna have to hear it. Damn.. never shit where you eat. Now i hope things wont be awkward at class since we sit next to each other for the next 2 months.

deutschmann59 · 03-20-2006, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BellasBmw

Now i hope things wont be awkward at class since we sit next to each other for the next 2 months.

What do you mean? It's those long, drawn-out moments of off-colored-ness that adds zest to life!!!

Just chock it up to experience...it's only two months. And they go quick. Soon it will be Easter, then two-three weeks, then it's finals time. It could be worse...it could be january

But don't worry, this kind of stuff happens to people all the time. I can never walk into Papa Johns ever again, if that makes you feel any better

03-19-2006, 09:40 PM	#23
deutschmann59 Captain 182 Rep 737 Posts Drives: 2006 325i Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: e90post.com iTrader: (0)	I'd be super-pissed if a chick acted like she was interested in me and then all of a sudden she isn't. You can always use the old "I've got a baby to take care of" routine. That always made me instantly lose interest...however, everytime it happened it was true...I don't know how good you are at lying!
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03-19-2006, 09:56 PM	#27
shimshimhada Brigadier General 491 Rep 4,838 Posts Drives: Portal Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: Portal iTrader: (2)	Better yet, say you're a post-op with a baby!
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03-19-2006, 09:58 PM	#28
BMW F22 Major General 3659 Rep 9,783 Posts Drives: ///M235i Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (8)	So I saw the title of this thread and thought "what the hell is too soon? It's not a marriage or a proposal." So Bella- if you're looking for a fun time between now and the time you leave, let all hell break loose.
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03-19-2006, 10:05 PM	#29
deutschmann59 Captain 182 Rep 737 Posts Drives: 2006 325i Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: e90post.com iTrader: (0)	Hey BMWE90, not to change the subject, but tomorrow's the big day, eh?
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03-19-2006, 10:07 PM	#30
BMW F22 Major General 3659 Rep 9,783 Posts Drives: ///M235i Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Bay Area iTrader: (8)	Tomorrow's monday. I have that class on Tuesday and Thursday. HAHA the wait is driving me crazy.
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03-19-2006, 10:27 PM	#31
Neil The Designer 5 Rep 233 Posts Drives: Nissan Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: CT, USA iTrader: (0)	I don't know if the guy is a superstud or not but if not perhaps he is smitten by a fairly attractive woman seeming to get closer to him. Guys aren't great generally at getting the small hints given off by women. Just be more obvious. Or perhaps he knows you are leaving and wants to score before you leave. Some people have lofty goals.
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03-20-2006, 01:31 AM	#33
BellasBmw If love is the answer,please rephrase the question 335 Rep 1,731 Posts Drives: Tit Silver 325i Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: San Diego, Ca iTrader: (1) Garage List 2006 325i [0.00]	Ok hes not ugly. But he has baggage too. Hes a cool guy, but.. i dont know why i cant just "let all hell break loose". Im paranoid about dating, and it feels awkward, but at the same time i was all about him before he started asking me to hang out all the time. My x- long story. We were together for 2 yrs, close as hell, and he lost trust, and became paranoid. Starting accusing me of cheating, and wanted to listen to voicemail/check my phone/email...etc. We broke it off dec 1 (bad breakup) and on dec 23 he trashed my room and stole all my jewelry, money, xmas gifts..etc. So yea im having a hard time getting over that, esp since i havent talked to him at all since dec 1. I have no asnwers to why, and my family helpd him ALOT. Even i did. I found out he was doing coke behind my back. He started to sell alot of weed..So it makes me wonder how can you really know someone.. i thought i did. Guess i was wrong. Anyway im just afraid of meeting another wacko guy. I didnt think he was, but then wow what a wake up call. As for being sexual with the guy, i just dont care/feel like it. I mean whatever, its not like my x where i WANTED him.. And before me and the new guy hung out.. i thought about it alot. Maybe he's too pushy and im losing the interest. But im gonna tell him that im planning to spend the rest of my time here with my girlfriends and family. Sure we can hang out but liek once a week. __________________ ~~BellasBmw~~ Proud mama to 325i/TiAg/Black lette/Pwr seats/Sirius/Sport/Walnut/Step/Xenons/Chrome exhaust/20% tint
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03-20-2006, 01:54 AM	#34
findtom Colonel 132 Rep 2,658 Posts Drives: E60 545i Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Toronto, Canada iTrader: (0) Garage List 2005 545i [0.00]	Wow... sorry to hear that, what a psycho.
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03-20-2006, 01:58 AM	#35
E90-4life auto pilot 279 Rep 822 Posts Drives: E60 M5 chilln on slicks Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: SoCal iTrader: (0)	Well, a couple of things... 1. it's his fault for having gotten too excited, guys should be a lot better than that at reading girls these days. 2. Don't blame other potential future mates for the screw ups of previous bf's. they shouldn't be penialized for crap they didn't do. Not trying to sound abrasive, just honest.
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03-20-2006, 02:55 AM	#36
mtnyeti12 Private 13 Rep 79 Posts Drives: 2006 325xi Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: NC iTrader: (0)	Bella - does he repeatedly put his hand on your leg then pull it away followed by "A schuzzy... a schuzzy... a schuzzy me". If so you may have a problem.... Okay so I just saw Euro Trip... things get out here a little slower. __________________ TiAG\|Black Dakota\|Burl\|Xenon\|Steptronic\|Premium\|I-Drive\|CA\|CW\|
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03-20-2006, 03:54 AM	#37
timzerofive there is no spoon 254 Rep 867 Posts Drives: 330i manual Join Date: May 2005 Location: Irvine iTrader: (0) Garage List 2006 330i [0.00]	I don't think you should make up an excuse to hang out less with him. You should just come right out and say it... I like you, but since I just got out of a long relationship, I think you're moving a little too fast for me. Especially since I'll be moving away for school soon, I don't want to get into any serious relationship. We can still hang out once in a while if you like, but I think that's about it... IMO you should say something to that effect, otherwise, no matter what you do, you'll hurt people's feeling sooner or later. __________________ [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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03-20-2006, 09:12 AM	#41
Oz Lieutenant Colonel 33 Rep 1,770 Posts Drives: 2006 330i, 2004 X5 Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Wayne, NJ iTrader: (1) Garage List 2006 330i [0.00]	I hope he's not reading this thread.. I think you should just tell him your deal straight up before It gets any further. __________________ 2006 330i Steptronic/Alpine White/Black Leather/Burl Walnut Trim/Premium Package/iDrive/Heated Seats/Winter: STYLE 159 Blizzak LM-22 RFT/Summer: TBD 2004 X5 Steptronic/Alpine White/Grey Leather/Poplar Trim/Premium Package/Heated Seats/iPod Adapter
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03-20-2006, 12:00 PM	#43
BellasBmw If love is the answer,please rephrase the question 335 Rep 1,731 Posts Drives: Tit Silver 325i Join Date: Jul 2005 Location: San Diego, Ca iTrader: (1) Garage List 2006 325i [0.00]	Trust me, ive actually never been the type to not express how i feel. Im usually straight forward and honest. But for some weird reason i just cant tell him. Maybe its cause i feel bad since he really likes me. But whatever, hes gonna have to hear it. Damn.. never shit where you eat. Now i hope things wont be awkward at class since we sit next to each other for the next 2 months. __________________ ~~BellasBmw~~ Proud mama to 325i/TiAg/Black lette/Pwr seats/Sirius/Sport/Walnut/Step/Xenons/Chrome exhaust/20% tint
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